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ygrittesnow: when we were babies my dad was a stay-at-home dad while my mom kicked ass in the courtroom but he would carry my twin brother and me around with one baby on the front and one on his back in backpacks and women would come up and look at how

ostracizedpoodle: what was life like before copy and paste

rnarker: shit’s going down i whisper as i flush the toilet

ironmax: i hate it when people are like “no you’re not old enough to know your sexuality yet” like as if you’re not allowed to be anything other than heterosexual until you’ve reached a certain age and you get a ticket to choose your path of

meowbella: i hate when someone is pretty and also funny like stop that you only get one

If I’m a sarcastic asshole when I talk to you its either because I really like you and feel comfortable teasing you Or I really hate you and don’t care if you know it Good luck figuring out which one

camplazlo: one time in fourth grade i stole this kid’s gameboy and a couple months later we were chillin at my house and he was looking at my stuff and found the gameboy and he was like “wow i used to have one of these” and i asked he wanted

heyimbritni: wow, some people’s names dont match their face. like lets say youre talking to a hot guy, he looks like matt or ashton, but his name is mary or bartholomew

msjewbooty: *wraps self in toilet paper* i am a piece of shit

ourbedroomafterthewar: do you ever get like really hopeful about someone for no reason and start thinking about all the wonderful things that could happen and then you realize they just don’t think about you like that and you’re crushed and you feel

calvinccandie: when i find myself in times of trouble mother mary comes to me speaking words of wisdom get your shit together

nosdrinker: shelbylinnea: nosdrinker: next time i like somebody just remind me to kill myself it’ll be easier Or you could take a chance on someone you thought was totally out of your league and end up with the best relationship you’ve ever had.

urbancatfitters: i’m annoying like 75% of the time and during the other 25% i’m asleep

like-dry-clean-only: i guess the real question is how can you not like tesla he thought women would eventually rule the world because we’re the dominant sex he liked pigeons he was a vegetarian he was a babe he was shy he hated edison he’s

genies: My life is like a romantic comedy except there’s no romance and It’s just me laughing at my own jokes

rnerrychristmas: how do i get into the popular text post bloggers clique is this like some illuminati type shit

aangnog: matt-ketchup: aangnog: if u dont like mozzarella sticks then i assume u also dont like jesus I like mozzarella sticks but I dont like jesus they are a packaged deal im sorry but youre going to have to give up your liking of mozzarella stick

reinbeer: why do cats just like leave their tongues out and forget about them what if humans did that too

Toph’s blindness was one of the most excellently handled aspects of AtLA because it wasn’t treated like a disability. So often in shows (and especially children’s animation) disabled characters are limited to apperances in “very special episodes”

greywardensexual: DO YOU EVER START LISTENING TO AN AUDIO POST AND THEN START SCROLLING DOWN YOUR DASH JAMMING OUT BUT THEN YOU COME ACROSS ANOTHER AUDIO POST AND YOUR LIKE “oH„„ I WANT TO LISTEN TO THAT ONE TOO” BUT THE OTHER AUDIO POST IS STILL

starksfell: those textbooks that rip out your sOul and eat it while you watch because you think you only have 1 question to do for homework but no it’s like 1. a) b) c) d) e) f) g) h) i) j) k) l) m) n) o) p) q) r) s) t) u) v) w) x) y) z)

lifeisbutts: Oh man, I feel like I should become a terrible person and start attacking people like in the last panel.

jcatgrl: euphoricdays: yes they do yes they do are you kidding i know so many guys that are super rude like out of nowhere what if they’re gay and also find him attractive is that a joke everyone is at least a little two faced no they won’t not

ofmiceandbren: hboscar: Worth reading… monstersinmybathtub: sararye: I started reading and was like “what the actual fuck” before reaching the end bless you Holy crap. god bless ur sol omg

Only tumblr can give me feels about math… why. crying. I feel like this could accurately describe some ships I’ve shipped. math feels And whats even worse is regular ol’ intersecting lines They meet once and grow farther apart forever. That awkward

wolf-cub: when shipping costs more than the item and i’m just like

westernkanye: it’s so rude when babies just babble and shit speak english when you’re talking to me punk

when you say something and immediately regret it and like even like 20 years later everyone has forgotten about it but you’re still like ‘oh damn why did I say that’

titytwochainz: My kids ain’t gonna believe in Santa Clause. I work all year to provide and some fat white man get the credit? Sound like slavery to me.

ohshititsgreg: avvatar: duoverse: marcelinesexual: i wish i could carry around cards at school that have reaction images on it so when someone says something stupid i could just hold up a card and be like this exists it’s called facial expression

christmassassy: sometimes i’m like “wow i hate myself and want to die” but on good days i’m just like “wow i hate myself”

It’s ridiculous that celebrities can spend a year of my college tuition on like, a necklace like it’s nothing and I can’t even afford a taco.

arcticmonkies: idk my sense of humor is really obnoxious and when im not being obnoxious im being really boring and quiet so i guess i can understand why no one likes me

tempoes: everyone says “just get out and leave everything behind in the event of a house fire” like no fuck that shit im grabbing every electronic i can hold

n0thingleftinside: matchbook-stories: lisasedai: i hate it when there’s like a feeling in your gut that something is very wrong and the feeling is so strong that it makes you feel physically ill but the problem is that there’s actually nothing

touay: “youre so lucky that you can draw” yyeah it was all luck and not at all grueling and emotionally exhausting practice kind of like how olympians are lucky that theyre so good at sports

literallysnokoplasm: i really hate it when im reading a book and i picture the whole setting in my head a certain way and then the author mentions something which completely messes up the way i view the room or scene like a door on the left side instead

agentdalecooper: the bag my necklaces came in was tiny and my dad just looks at me and says “this is what they sell cocaine in on the streets” and his eyes lit up and he put some baking powder into the bag and put it on the counter and i was like

kanyewesticle: hi can u not reblog posts from me and add a shit caption i feel like i am held responsible for your behavior and i have failed you as a mother

calibornthisway: ok people are saying that jake and jane are like cosmo and wanda but do u remember peppy happy gary and peppy happy betty

bringmethehomos: I feel like if the devil ever wanted somewhere to hide he could just go on tumblr and no one would suspect a thingI mean he could be all like “I am the Dark Lord Satan” and someone else would just be like “yeah me too high five

badonelle: the best way to test if someone’s just saying they like the same things you do to get in your pants is to make up an unrealistic lie one time this annoying dude asked me what my favorite band was and I told him “boku no pico” he was

charming-tothelast: You know that moment when you’re reading a book and you just have to stop and bite your lip and squeal or sigh or close your eyes and wrinkle your nose and forehead and press the book against your heart and just like sit there and

why do boys act like they’ve committed a great humanitarian deed and single handedly solved world hunger when they say ‘i like girls with no makeup’ like congratulations would you like a nobel peace prize you fantastic feminist you

#this is the most realistic portrayal of what would happen if you were to randomly burst into song And this is why I love Enchanted. It’s like a Disney movie and a Disney parody at the same time.

eleanorjanestyle: i hate when i lose things at school like my pencils and papers and life ambitions

samandriel: i wish that there were miniature whales like 6 inch whales that you could put in a tank and own as a pet like wow guys look at my pet whale how great would that be

twipen: princekili: aka fili and kili More like Kili and Thorin

execute-billiards: shada-was-in-the-area-and: mechanicalbino: ctrayn: arthurdarvillismyspiritanimal: agentsama: sardinesawesomeness: whimsicalsummersunflower: Its like an evolution 0.o OHMYGOD In which Tim Burton has just been directing one

jakeenglish: i dont get why people hate hipster/summer blogs so much just leave em be all they wanna do is reblog pictures of girls in floral shorts and half-empty starbucks drinks let them that is what they like and i am 100% certain they think your

jonesalicious: So after belle and the beast got married they have to buy all new furniture since like half their castle turned into people

rabioheab: i just translated the lyrics for boom boom pow by the black eyed peas into chinese then back into english and i’m going to shit myself

targayen: IN MIDDLE SCHOOL THERE WAS THIS GUY AND ONE DAY HE WORE SWEATPANTS AND ONE OF THE DEANS SAW THE PHONE IN HIS POCKET AND WAS LIKE “YOU CANT HAVE PHONE DURING SCHOOL YOU HAVE TO GIVE IT TO ME FOR THE REST OF THE CLASS PERIOD” BUT IT WASNT

beefysquirrels: i was washing dishes the other day and i got so into it i felt like a 50s housewife and halfway through i became overwhelmed with the thought that i had to cook dinner and pick the kids up from school but then i remembered that i’m

scaper12123: everything-thats-shark: whimmy-bam: meandmybabylove: Just realized that this is game graphics… YOU’VE GOT TO BE SHITTING ME ladies and gentlemen skyrim when 100 mods are running THE F?!

freddybenson: shout out to the 2 people who always like and reblog your posts

if i die and people post statuses about me on facebook and act like they knew me or were nice to me i will come back and fucking murder them

michaelpalin: i dont understand the pleasure in sexting like ok what if i got a text that was like ‘oh my dick is hard’ like what would ????? how do i respond?? ‘i’m so happy for you’

3-2-1queer: When I was in fifth grade I realized I liked girls but I was like “that’s a problem for another day” and literally forgot about it and then in like eleventh grade I was like “oh my god”

I AM GOING TO CONFISCATE THE CHARACTERS FROM THE WRITERS AND BE LIKE, “YOU CAN HAVE THESE BACK WHEN YOU LEARN TO BE KIND TO THEM”

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